How often do we notice that the voice in our head is punishing and cruel instead of positive and supporting? Is there a way we can develop a kinder, softer, and more compassionate voice within ourselves? So often clients come to repair relationships with others when in fact the primary relationship, the one we have with ourselves, is overlooked. This even though it is closely connected to our inner voice and the self-talk it generates. Perhaps we will begin to take more notice of this inner dialogue and how we feel about ourselves.

Each of us carries an invisible stick that is often used to beat ourselves up with. This tends to happen when we make a mistake, get something wrong or perceive in some way that it is our fault. All this blaming and shaming is like extra worn out furniture that serves no purpose in the tranquil environment of our minds and our bodies. Let’s get rid of it. These are the very things that lead us to picking up the stick.

Instead, I propose we pick up a feather. Yes, that is right, a feather. Why? Well because a feather is light, soft and beautiful to look at and reminds us of something that has been let go of or shed. Exactly what we need to do with the punitive thoughts. And a feather feels so much nicer gliding across our skin then a stick. So, the next time you feel yourself bending down to pick up the stick of shame and blame, try and imagine it as a beautiful feather, gliding over your skin, reminding you that letting go and staying “light” is how we really learn to be in relationship, most of all with self. And isn’t that where every journey of discovery begins?